You were promised endless babes once you developed that six pack and those boulder shoulders… but now all you are left with is a heap of disgusting protein powder and failed tinder dates. What happened? Sadly, the answer isn’t to add another 5 inches to your arms, either.
Obviously working out doesn’t guarantee your luck with ladies… Sorry bros. We’re willing to bet you’ve seen that shredded, vascular bodybuilder that hogs the cable cross machines for hours? He’s hogging the cables because nobody loves him.
In fact, you’ve noticed you have actually found yourself looking at other men’s muscles fondly, admiring bodybuilder’s veins, spending all your time scrolling Instagram looking for ‘inspiration’, aka basically naked ripped dudes.
What is happening to us? Is our lack of luck with women turning us into gay muscle-men? It is certainly turning us into fiendish pervs…
So let’s investigate…
The number one reason men aren’t meeting and hooking up with hunnies really surprised me. The problem is, the more we workout, the more that reason gets worse! When studying what men had the best chance of getting some action, scientists came up with one determining factor.
That one determining factor is the Mating Market. (I know, sounds barbaric, and also sexy)
But what is a mating market? Does that mean I should stop working out and go work at the Costco meat section down the road?
The answer is clear, so let’s find out how to use your meatheadedness to increase your mating market and slay the hunnies those Muscle Insider magazines promised you.
Your value as a mate is very context-dependent and will go up or down depending on the situation. If you’re a raging meat head that can bench 445lbs, chances are you won’t be slaying babes at the local art gallery.
Find places that make your muscles shine. Go somewhere where those arms can be respected, like a local waterpark? Join a chess club perhaps? Your value as a bodybuilder is lost in a room full of bodybuilders. Duh.
To find a good mating market, go to where the women are. Plain and simple. “But my gym has like 4 hot chicks” yes, we realize your gym has a few babes at it, but at the gym, you are competing with the 500 other shredded Schwarzenegger-looking bad boys… Good luck.
Go workout somewhere that there will be tons of women and you’ll be in an actual authoritative position (which improves your mating value). For example, getting a gym membership at the local college. This is a huge opportunity to meet sexy young ladies. Also, it gives you that ‘older, mysterious, pervy, overly muscular’ vibe that girls dig.
Find out the rest on the next page…
Your relative bargaining power is important. Simply speaking that means, what other options do the women around you have? If there’s a shortage of good men, you have higher bargaining power. Don’t get a membership at Gold’s gym (aka muscle-head mania), go and get one at the local Curves (posing as a woman for that sneaky membership).
If you can’t ditch and switch gyms, try bringing something else to the table. You need to be able to compete – but if you’re not rich, that’s fine. Be smart, interesting, empathetic, and stop only talking about your new pre-workout.
If we could spend 5 minutes of our workout talking about something other than our new bulking diet, we would be a clear standout in the race for the gym babe. Try this, “Hey girl, do you think that 9/11 was an inside job conducted by the Bush administration?”
So there it is. Join a running club, join the local women’s fitness club, and go back to university. Just don’t turn to Crossfit.
Happy mating bros, may your guns be large and your protein be plentiful.