The most exciting time for most women who love their active lifestyle is when we train. We all have these encouraging mantras in our heads: “Stay strong… you can kill this workout! Imagine the satisfaction when you crawl back home…’’
Some days, however, we have discouraging ideas popping up in our minds: ‘’Think about it… Do you really want to train today? I mean nothing will happen if you take extra few rest days…’’ But even in these situations, most of the time, motivational thoughts win by laying a guilt trip on us.
“If you don’t go, you will stop your progress, get covered in fat, lose muscle mass and feel terrible. Do you really want that?’’ This is one of those unavoidable thoughts in the back of our mind, but it’s relatively simple to overcome. Up to this moment, haters have been found in three environments:
These species of haters are really more interested in putting your enthusiasm down than accepting that you are not like them. Their weapon is verbal as seen with all of these species. First they start with sarcasm: “We are so glad we do not need a man in our office, she can replace all those empty water bottles on water dispensing machine with full ones.”
Then they move to fake interest in your training: “Could you already deadlift your manager? It should be around 100kg.” Finally, they move to your food, with comments like “I feel so sad for you. If I ate what you’re eating, I would cry every day. Do you want some cake?”
Let’s add non-stop invites to go out drinking when they clearly know you will not. And this can go on and on…
Our family members can represent another group of haters. There are those lucky ones out there who have parents and siblings who are supportive or even have the same lifestyle. Sadly, this is not always the case…
You always think your family should be proud when they see you happy, but once you mention the gym and all your achievements there (come on, an increase in your squat is one of the best things!), their faces suddenly change. In one moment, these loving people can become worried or concerned.
First, it’s your mom thinking you’re taking steroids (or planning on it). Second, it’s your dad or your brother telling you muscles don’t matter and that all they want is for you to be happy with your life (somehow, lifting weights in their mind represents you being depressed or mentally weak).
Finally, it is just too much! Your muscles are too big and you don’t want to look like a manly daughter, do you? Your sister tries to balance everything out and tells you she is proud of you. She says your parents are just being parents and your brother does not understand fully. You feel slightly better, but then she adds she could never live like you do…
The gym is the last place where we would expect to find haters. But there are some residing there, too. Usually, it’s men who have not found their (mating) partner. They try to tell you that you look amazing, that your training routine looks very hard and that you seem to be extremely dedicated.
However, you should NOT put more size on because if you train harder, you will not be feminine anymore (in their eyes). And for some reason, it is highly important to them (probably they are scared to be emasculated).
There are some females who look at you with surprise (and slight disgust) when you deadlift 100kg. All they do is run those kilometres on the treadmill, glancing once in a while to see if you turned into a monster yet, because surely you cannot be all woman!
All these people have their own reasons to be mean. Some of them truly feel so much guilt that they cannot manage their own motivation and dedication levels. Others just simply do not understand you or bodybuilding at all. All they know are extreme pictures of women abusing steroids, and in their minds, you are becoming one of them.
A herd of haters do not like someone slightly different than them and they will do everything to bite you! Weird enough they do not see that biting makes you stronger and more motivated. Maybe we should actually thank them?