Ladies (and gentlemen) take note: size really does matter. More than 16,000 women took part in a study confirming what we’ve long suspected. In matters of the downstairs, small is okay, but bigger is better.
We pear shapes finally have something—apart from our ginormous glutes—to rub in the faces of our slim-about-the-hip sisters.That’s right, baby, whether you’re genetically blessed or forged yours in the gym, here are the top eight reasons to love your big booty.
1. Big Butts Are Better to Touch
You know that line in the wedding vows, to have and to hold…it’s about butts. Well, it should be. We all love to touch, hold, and squeeze a juicy double. There’s no denying, there’s something primal-yet-sweet when bae gets his giant paws on our rear end.
2. The Bigger, the Healthier
Studies show women with big bums have a lower risk of cardiovascular disease and diabetes. They also have low cholesterol even with a higher than average BMI. As long as that fat stays off your belly and firmly on your butt, hips and thighs, you’re likely to live longer than the skinny minnies.
3. Better Control Around Food
The adipose tissue (fat) stored in the butt and hips areas share production of the hormone leptin. This hormone is responsible for regulating appetite and decreasing hunger by telling the brain the body has enough fat. So, in this case, fat bottomed girls do take the cake, although they only take a little bit.
4. It Can Make You Famous
Kim Kardashian, Nicki Minaj, Amber Rose and Jen Selter all have bottoms that are marginally more recognized than their faces. That’s not to say these women aren’t talented and smart in their own right, and science would be on their side. However, there’s no arguing with the facts; Kim nearly damned near broke the Internet with her’s.
5. Smarter You, Smarter Kids
Women with some junk in the trunk have higher levels of the Omega-3 fatty acids responsible for cognitive function. Yep, a banging body and brains, it hardly seems fair does it? To add insult to injury, it is believed the brainy benefits are passed on to fortunate offspring during breastfeeding.
6. The Word Badonkadonk
This is the coolest word for the bottom ever. No matter how sad you are because the writers of Containment killed off Katie, saying badonkadonk will make you smile. And touch yours! There’s even more than one song referencing the almighty badonkadonk.
7. Men Prefer Them
They look great and feel even better, what’s not to love? Plus, there’s another tiny reason why men are all about that bass, it just happens to lie in their jeans genes. The hourglass shape that usually comes with a perkier posterior is a sign of youth, fertility and ease in childbearing. Men are actually right on this one ladies, they really can’t help it.
8. Fillin’ Out Dem Jeans
Or yoga pants. Everything looks better with a pair of plump buns inside it, or around it. The only thing that suits a great pair of glutes better is no clothes.
If after reading this you realise you’re single, childless, flat as a pancake back there and now, rightfully worried you may be slow, never fear. There’s no shortage of exercises aimed at building you a belfie worthy behind.
Thankfully, with no judgement on the state of the world, there’s also a bevy of bootilicious young women in bikinis showing us how to execute them. These videos can often be found on our testosterone-fuelled brother site, SpotMeBro, but here’s one to get you started.